The #Metoo campaign took off on social media last week. We saw the crash and burn of Harvey Weinstein that prompted a renewed level of awareness about the ongoing issue of predatory behaviour. I watched as the vulnerability of each person posting their #Metoo helped others add theirs. A new conversation and dialogue has begun in a world that sometimes feels as if it is moving backwards.
This awareness is creating the platform for us to express just how deeply we need to have this ‘conversation.’ For myself, sexual harassment, innuendo and subtle (or not so subtle) advances began from when I was a very young girl. It was comprised of looks, grabs, groping, to suggestive statements and escalated from there to more overt actions that included assault and rape. Saying no meant you were not putting out, they thought they ‘owned ‘you, that you owed them, they took ‘liberties’ because they were stronger and bigger…and on it goes. I truly pray that this ‘campaign’ will shine light in areas that need it…it has to stop. It just has to.
And I feel it is important to consider the perpetrators of these heinous acts. They were often abused and violated themselves. I am not saying what they did was ‘right’ but there is a deep suffering in them too. I believe most people are actually trying to heal themselves in some way, even if it looks ‘wrong’. I also feel we need to be careful about pointing fingers; to see this issue as an opening for further conversations, more dialogue, and much more education!
Conscious educating is the key to helping resolve this issue. It would be a different world if from an early age we learned about saying our yes, our no, setting boundaries, respecting other’s boundaries, asking permission to kiss, touch and hug etc. To honour the bodies ‘private and sacred parts’; to share our fears, desires and boundaries before consensual intimacy, to connect from our hearts first and build a strong foundation in relationships before ever taking the ‘big step.’ The idea of savouring the intimate connections and languishing in all the nuances of relationship with the need to rush into anything more.
Jeff brown shared this: “One of the great challenges for those who have survived abusive and neglectful parents is that there is often a part of us that is still waiting for them to love us, even if there is very little chance of that happening. Locked in an archaic mindset, we continue to go back for more, looking for love in all the wrong places. Somehow we imagine that they will come around one day, realize their mistakes, see our worth, soften those armored edges. And some do, often when they are very old, made vulnerable by sickness and time. But many don’t, and we need to stop putting our emotional lives on hold waiting for something that may never happen. The bridge from stagnation to empowerment lies in our willingness to see them for who they really are, to take them off their primal pedestal and recognize their human limitations. This is not easy- the hungry child self clings to illusions- but it is oh so necessary. Until we accept the reality of who can’t love us, we cannot embrace the love of those who can.”
I can relate to what Tammi has to say below – I too, have sat with thousands of people over the eyars who shared their stories with me:
“I have lost count of how many women I’ve sat with, in the roots of their bodies, repairing the damage done by sexual abuse and violation. And let me be clear, the female body and energy system are far too powerful to be damaged by these acts–but what is damaged is the woman’s connection to her own body, to her own knowing of her body as sacred. That connection between herself and her body is what must be repaired to heal.
But once the shame is cleared–the shame that belongs not to her but to each perpetrator that was so empty he had to steal the light of another–she returns home to her body to find that it was waiting for her. The medicine she needs is there in her pelvic bowl. Her creative essence flows over the assault lines like gold. I welcome this rise of the feminine light in the growing fault lines.” – Tammi Kent
Let us expand our light and leave the world transformed by our high level of conscious action with challenges such as this. Sending love, light and deep healing to all beings on this planet that have ever suffered.. By focusing on love we truly heal.
I wish you an abundant fall season filled with much love, passion and adventure. As always I am here to support you in this life journey – and welcome your feedback.